DAY SIX. FRIEND.

The word of the day is friend.

noun: a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations.

This is my favourite definition of the word. Because it is closest to my definition of a friend. Okay, I lied there. That definition is closest to the ideal definition of friends.  The idea of mutual affection is bizarre, we can’t read minds, we can’t guess if our affection is mutual, for all we know all the people we call friends could be like vultures, circling around for our deaths. We must accept that most people we call friends are allies, fans, frenemies, connections or people we want to do or do things with. But friendship exists, just good old fashioned bonds and affection. We actually love our friends. They are crazy, sometimes even annoying but we choose them. I suffer from Wonder Woman complex. I have answers for everything, even when I don’t know, I look until I know. It is my most annoying quality. I ask my friends for advice then I tell them what I was thinking then they give me the ‘WTF were you asking me if you already made up your mind?’ The truth is I don’t know most things and I love that I have people around to annoy. I have different kinds of friends, people who I don’t even see in months and people who trip if I don’t see them at least bi-weekly. *sigh* Life and living. I understood the value of friendship early. There are many times when all I need is someone to listen, to be there, to laugh with or to do nothing with. Friendship is selfish as it is selfless. We get gratification from going above and beyond for our people.

Friendship is a retarded concept, the mere expectation of someone who doesn’t even share your blood to be there for you no matter what. You know when the concept gets even more retarded? When it is between a male and a female. Naturally males and females were supposed to create the perfect friendships because they supplement where the other lacks. Males bring logic, strength and the much needed focus that females usually lack. Females bring the flavour, the beauty, the creativity and the nurturing. A combination of male and female is supposed to be perfect. In a utopian society males and females chat, hang out, agree and fist bump about everything. In that same utopian society lions go looking for fresh grass with gazelles and Wi-Fi grows on trees. In reality males want to do things while females want to talk about doing things. Hours are wasted with females trying to make males explain why, how and when whilst males just have mutual unspoken understanding of these whys, hows and whens. The sensible thing is to do is what we did when we were five years old. Males play with males while females play with females. Only mummys and daddys hang out and they aren’t really friends, they are mummy and daddy. That would have worked but the gift of puberty taught us that we love our differences. Males love Eminem, tech things and football. Females love to hate the things that males love. Males hate YouTube make-up tutorials but love when women watch them. My friend rolls her eyes and says her boyfriend is so obsessed with weight lifting and yet she loves that he can lift her and toss her on the bed. I’m an only daughter. I have brothers and that’s who I blame for my male-female tendencies. There are males with female proclivities as there are females with male ones. Everyone has their story. Mine is I am a female who loves rap music, who can curse more than most men, who loves logic, Crime and Investigation channel and I sometimes I relish the sounds of my farts. I click very well with males because it is drama free. I am the same female who is a whiz with make-up, loves gossip and loud laughing with my girls and melts for a good love story. My male friend saw me as a dude. We bonded on that plane. Then he began to love that I was like a dude and somehow he found that attractive and to seal the deal I wore a dress and showed him I wasn’t all nigga, I could be a girl too. This has happened before. A nigga falling for his nigga. Which makes me ask the question, can a male and a female really be described as friends? Or we are potential mates until we are no longer each other’s type.

Honestly, I don’t care anymore. Friendship is fun and it is real. Males and females will always try to do each other, it is for the increase of the human race. I think the most important thing is to never forget friendship. Never forget to be selfish sometimes, to be selfless all times. Never forget to be honest. Remember to tell your friend their flaws and your grievances to their face. Protect your friends’ view of themselves, allow them to be secure that you got them. Try not to be judgemental of who your friends are. Because in the end, friendship is divine.

 (…on the real though….don’t screw your friends, it is a trap.)