DAY NINE. ATTRACTION.

I was raised with boys. By some fluke I was a girl but everyone born before and after me was male and that was my reality. Girls have the privilege of toying with idea of attraction and acting like it doesn’t exist for them. Not boys. Boys know what they like, the react to it and they aren’t afraid to state it. That is probably why there are more songs about ass than they are about six packs. Being around boys so long warped my behaviour and perspective. It took five years of boarding school to re-wire and teach me that girls smile and look away until the boy comes and says hello. Once in a while my inner young man comes out; when I see a fine man I stare. I remember seeing a statuesque, young man in Shoprite; he was over flowing with pheromones and carrying great baby making genetics. I more than stared. I walked behind him along the aisles just to enjoy the view.

That’s the thing about attraction. It is the in-built reminder that human beings are animals. Some people have a type. They like thick legs and rounded hips. Some like breasts and nice lips. Some women like the typical tall, dark and handsome. When we look closer, it is clear what these qualities boldly represent. They show off fruitfulness, health, productivity, strength and safety. It is in us as animals to mate with those that can make our specie evade extinction.

What about people like me…I am not going to stand here and pretend that a six pack isn’t attractive. It is! But after a while my type has been boiled down to a great mind, nice hands and a sense of humour that can keep up with mine. I also find myself drawn to skinny, tall ones but I am not saying that’s my type. I also found that there are people that like broken people, twisted people that make them want to nurture and fix. Others like challenging people; people that never say yes when there is an option for no. I know a guy who has only dated simple looking women; women who are grey in looks but wildly colourful in their intellect and personality. If attraction is down to biology and thriving of the specie I don’t know what that says about people like me.

Attraction is dangerous. It is fleeting. So you can’t base any life decisions on it. A person can capture you the moment you lay your eyes on them and it would take one wrong conversation or ugly shoe to take that moment away. Sometimes attraction is senseless, you can pursue the object of your attraction and find that there is nothing there. Sometimes attraction never ever goes away. There are those people who are all kinds of wrong that you will always be attracted to.

Attraction is in the moments. It’s in the way they say your name. The way the light catches their skin. It’s in the way they walk. It’s in expanse of their shoulders and the way they drive and laugh at really dry jokes. Sometimes attraction is really simple, you start a conversation and it doesn’t end, it just flows seamlessly; by the end you know you have met someone cut from the same cloth as you.

Attraction is fun.