LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL

I have had a lot to say. I just haven’t known how to say it. I also haven’t had the emotional strength to go through the motions of saying it.  Nevertheless, I will say it because I had a great day yesterday and the whole pineapple I just ate was kind to me.

Life is a much more powerful force than we give it credit. Plans change, dreams get crushed, friendships end, it’s like every destination has a detour in this life. I found myself at a point where I was tired of fighting the process. Why believe, invest and make effort when life will still go its own way in the end? I got tired, even a little bitter about it. I started making rules that guided my life, my interactions with others and my attitude with myself, just to ease the trauma when life goes its way and guess what?? I still ended up empty and even bitterer than before. Humans are too complex to be handled by a rule book. Where I wasn’t looking is where I got hit and where I wasn’t investing is where I needed the returns the most.

In my original mind now would have been the time to say things like; keep friends around who add value to your life, leave room for disappointment, and get back at people who get you evil grin. Lol. But lately I have been feeling differently about it and thinking differently. What’s it to you if you visit someone and they never visit you? What’s it to you if you help someone and they take advantage? If you go around doing good for people for the sake of having power over them, for the sake of being seen as a good person or for the sake of getting them to do something in return, my friend you will wind up empty and you will feel used because your motives weren’t in the right place. Humans are selfish, it is nature, and everyone is steady looking for situations that are most comfortable for them. Love is simple, life keeps its flow. Let all the good you do in this life come from you, in fact, forget about all the good you do as soon as you do it. Who you are should reflect in your actions and it should come from inside. If you don’t feel like being nice, don’t be nice. There is no point in being fake. Be wise, don’t let people step on you for the sake of being good, state the realities and walk away from situations that bring negative energy to your life. I have a strange friend who likes to cycle, we were walking and I asked him why he had been avoiding me for a while and he looked me in the eye and said “You were bringing negative energy to the friendship so since I couldn’t help you, I decided to let you get fixed and I can tell you’re back. It is nice to have you back.”  Such refreshing honesty.

I had the privilege of seeing a man I know propose to his girlfriend, now wife. This was a simple lunch, we shared food and the moment, speaking different languages and just having a good time and the same energy transferred to his wedding. Since I let go of a lot of my own negativity, I see so much positivity in my life and I am surrounded by people who just live life as it is. I looked around and realised that all the people around me were people I hadn’t known for more than a year. The man was my lecturer and now we are friends, he is one of the most straight up people I know. The point of this was to remind myself that it isn’t all about ‘day ones’ and ‘squads’. Some people are loyal to ‘day ones’ and nasty to everyone else. People are here to be enjoyed, carry your good vibes everywhere. Your good vibes will be there to lift you up on those bad days, your good vibes will be the reputation that shields you when you aren’t present. People will stand up for you and defend your character. And I must add that people aren’t foolish, they can see through your fake smiles and double cheek kisses.

I handle my friendships the way I handle my relationships with my siblings these days; I don’t keep a score card of good deeds and parties attended or sweet conversations, I try to be honest and fair at all times, I don’t text all day but I am present when I am needed and lately I try to be the kind of friend I’d like to have. The present will change so relax, live, life is beautiful.