USED, OBJECTIFIED

Has a woman ever used you for sex?

“Yes but she was a slut and I just wanted to get my share.”

“Yes but I used her before she used me.”

“No, never. Women are too emotional and feminine to do such things.”

Those are the answers that I am sure have crossed most of your minds, this is my story now you re think them and decide.

She was tall, I am tall too but she seemed taller because her feet were always in heels, her legs in the type of pants that lengthened and made her appear toned. She was slim, fit and carried herself with a certain ease. Her lips were full and her cupid’s bow defined, it was so sexy when she said dirty things with an innocent look still in her eyes. She was shy in human interaction but aggressively erotic, completely unaware of her other sides when we were together. First day I met her we drank wine and she kissed me, hard and went straight to play with my breasts, telling me all along how she had played this image in her head the entire time. I enjoyed the difference in sensation, I savoured the strangeness and the blaring alarm in my head that asked me what was going on, my body didn’t seem to mind what was going on but my mind, oh my mind was going crazy racing and trying to figure things out, when she reached forward and put her hand in my already soaking wet panties my mind resigned and sat in the corner, waiting for it to be over before it bombarded me with thoughts and questions.

She called me a cab, paid for it and said she would call.

She never called. Never texted. My phone that usually buzzed with her funny texts and limericks was silent and I forlornly watched her name move from my frequently-talked-to list to my last spoken to three months ago list. I didn’t think much of it. Until she texted me, then called me and asked to meet me. This time she wore a skirt and brought a bottle of wine, it happened all over again and again, no text. But it was the third occurrence that really made me stop and think. I remember standing at the gate watching her drive away, with the odd taste of cum sitting at the base of my throat wondering what just happened. It seemed that her intense need for me seemed to disappear the moment her orgasm appeared. Before she left I asked her to text me but even from response I knew she wouldn’t. She got what she wanted and did what she wanted, me inclusive. I walked back to the house, thinking about the role I played in the whole thing.

Use. Using. Used. These are three things we do to material things. We buy tissue to use, after using it we throw it away because it is used. By feeling used I had admitted that I had made myself a material thing for use and to be used. I felt sexy and powerful whenever my actions resulted in her pleasure or whenever she gazed at my full figure in awe but then the feelings after were entirely up to me.

So maybe you have been used by a woman but you just don’t know it because you don’t view yourself as a material that can just be used. We hold the power over ourselves and how we react emotionally to circumstances. Women are just as sexual, just as powerful maybe even more erotic than some men I know. We just happen to grow in a society that tells us to dumb it down, to dilute the aggressive intelligence, to sit in silence or serve cold beverages while men debated hot topics, to be fragile, virgin and helpless because that is femininity. Any woman that exhibited strength or sexuality was given a name and laughed at. Our parents passed down the knowledge to be soft, untainted, fragile but nurturing, open but not pursuing because this was valued in a woman and our parents wanted us to be valuable women. So are the women who are the opposite of the norm tainted? Is plucked fruit really that bad or does it have a more interesting flavour? Can anyone make you feel something you don’t feel about yourself? Are we all just brainwashed by society, sitting around waiting for it to define us, tell us how to feel in certain circumstances and tells us who we are if we take certain choices.

Maybe I thought I was used by a woman, but now after thinking about it, I wasn’t. I just simply participated in her enlightenment. So ask yourself again, have you ever been used by a woman?

*Disclaimer: Thoughts are the authors own but activities and experiences may not be, venture with caution and a pinch of salt.